Super-long thread: I got kicked out of a Beatles tribute band

Mark Wein said:
Hehe. I played a Catholic Church carnival where the guy who was in charge of the stage ran 220v to the power drop they gave us. We plugged in, turned everything on and watched the smoke curl above the stage. El Borrachito and myself were playing through vintage Fender amps ad just had blown fuses but the bassist was playing through a new (at the time) David Eden bass amp and it fried his Furman power conditioner and then blew an internal fuse in the amp. My only casualty was a Boss TU-12 tuner. The fight with the stage manager and the parish priest must have been quite entertaining. They accused us of not testing the power before we plugged in. The power they supplied us.

The first and only time I called someone a "monkey boy" and told him to fuck off in front of a priest.
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Did you give him the full Emilio Lizardo "alot you know monkey boy"?
 
I .... I honestly don't know how to thank you, @smurfco , for posting that video. Never mind that it says 'bad things' about me, I laughed my ass off.

Full admission: at first, I thought 'this guy is a pure muso type, probably was in HS band, and snobby.' Hey, sue me: I don't know you. I pictured something like a refugee from a Vegas pit band, getting shitty with weekend players. That feeling started to shift somewhere in part III (like all good serials, you kept me strung along), and then ...

Dat video, tho.

All I can say is: I'm terribly fucking sorry. For my assumptions, but much more for you having to endure that. And TBH, I don't think I'm ready to blame a lack of practice. Because I don't think that four lifetimes of practice is going to help that.

***************************
Personal side story: was asked by long time friend if I could cover bass for his cover band. He is nice, I say 'sure.' At first practice (for which I purchased a really terrific Schecter Jazz Bass copy), the drummer literally will. Not. Talk. To. Me. Turns out previous bassist was his friend, but 'got kicked out' because .... wait for it ... he moved across the country. The drummer is literally batshit nuts (I won't share the diagnosis here, but I do mean literally). OK, I think, I know about 'issues,' and what the heck, this is a basement band that has yet to land a decent gig. No worries.

My friend the band leader (hereafter MFTBL) has a few decent originals, and I had already written bass parts for them, and helped him with arrangement. (note that I'm a mediocre player at best but know my way around a song and etc., and used to do that with pros, so he was getting some nice help there). And then I am given a list of tunes to learn, and I see on there: "Wonderwall."

Much more interesting is that during this first rehearsal, only two of us have ANY musicality. At all. One is a terribly nice guy who sings and plays rhythm guitar. He has a nice voice. He is a worse guitarist than me, which is saying something. But, you know: OK.

We slog through 90 minutes of some of the most unmusical noise I've ever fucking heard. It sounds like Shelley Winters bellowing over GG Allin bootlegs. I have a look of pure astonishment on my face. Is this for real? They say they've been practicing for over a year. Practicing what? Atonality? We could be amazing as a Schoenberg tribute act. This is hideous. I am already wondering how to get out of this. Worst is that MFTBL thinks things are going well! He wants badly to PLAY OUT.

And here I will confess my dirty secret: I didn't learn the fucking songs. At all. Oh, I memorized about 12 of them, but to be honest, I am starting to look at the wall during "Wonderwall" and literally think I wonder if they wonder why I'm staring at the wall during Wonderwall.

Two more practices go nowhere, except that the drummer still. Won't. Say. One. Word. To. Me. And so I show them a song of mine. Now, the song is written from the POV of a character who is not me, and the lyrics reflect this. At this, MFTBL mocks my song, saying "you weren't even born in the year you're writing about!!! Hahahhahahaha ....." And all I can think of is: holy shit. These people have no talent. Not "not much," but none. There's literally NO musicality here, no bounce.

And while I'm not that stuck on myself, I've had people who have actual careers as performers tell me that they like my songs, and in some cases, even sing them, just cuz they like them.

That night, driving home, I wonder how I can escape this. Because MFTBL is a good friend, and we have a LOT of friends in common. In fact, he is sort of well known for something completely different, and just wrote me a reference that got me a job. And hell, I care for him.

Next day I get a text. "I don't think you playing bass is going to work out." I nearly died laughing, and said "thanks for letting me know." Three years on, still jamming in the basement. Never played out yet. But at a party at MFTBL's house, they play a set. I am asked to come up for "Killing Moon." I say 'no' in about a half a second.

There MUST be a musical version of Dunning-Kruger. There MUST. It's just a jaw dropper when you stand in the middle of it.
 
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