Places That Just Aren’t Your Jam

Peen Simmons

Peen Simmons

Let’s Get Obtuse!
Any of you have cities/towns/states/municipalities/countries that just kinda suck for you? Like always a hassle or no redeeming features or a local sensibility that sucks eggs?

For me it’s Minneapolis. It’s like drinking molten garbage every goddamn time. It’s like Ned Flanders fucked a DMV and Minneapolis is the love child. It’s a place so sucky that it produced the funky cries of Prince yearning to be free. Paul Westerberg made a career out of writing about how everything here drains the life out of you.

Minneapolis makes Indianapolis seem cool.
 
toledo fucking ohio.
where i am now.
shit weather
shit people
flat ass corn/soybean fields everywhere you look.
can't wait to move away!
 
Louisville KY. I realize its not intuitive, maybe it was just my bad luck. I spent 3 days there and I've never encountered a ruder bunch of folks. From the bicycle police, to the hotel and venue staff , to the merchants and food vendors. Just short tempered and rude people everywhere. NYC was Mayberry by comparison.

Charlotte NC. Got there after dark on a rainy night and boy was it dark and dreary. They must have run out of paint and reflectors for the highway. Never seen so many burned out lights on the perimeter. They didn't even bother lighting up the billboards. It didn't get any cherrier in the daylight. Besides downtown, the whole place looked run down and tacky.
Downtown seemed ok. Some handy overhead building to building walkways that were well kept and well lit, and the hotel was nice. Downtown is a big banking center, guess they get the public funds.

Gillette WY. A run down coal mining town in the middle of nowhere. At the time coal was in a big slump and nobody was working. Talk about depressing.

Memphis TN. Face it, despite the history and the BBQ, Memphis sucks. If you've been there for any length of time you know.

Jacksonville FL. Kinda reminds me of Charlotte overall but at least they change the light bulbs. Atlantic Ocean is a positive I guess.

Montgomery AL. Capitol of the State and Confederacy surrounded by a city full of poverty and neglect. Awful place.
 
Suburban Detroit has every flavor of nightmare, from post industrial blight to trailer park desolation to rural nothing to McMansion horror.

Omaha is the saltine of cities.

And I'm not well suited to "party cities", with Vegas being the worst of them. NOLA is an exception, but I make a point of being in bed before the yard long cocktails show up.
 
Vegas - but people I know who live there do like it. they just avoid the casino parts of town.

Amarillo Texas. In the middle of freaking no where.
 
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Pine Apple Slim said:


Memphis TN. Face it, despite the history and the BBQ, Memphis sucks. If you've been there for any length of time you know.

Montgomery AL. Capitol of the State and Confederacy surrounded by a city full of poverty and neglect. Awful place.
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Every time I drive through these cities — not driving around town, just staying on the interstate — it's like a dreary cloud of despair envelopes everything. They're both armpits.
 
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