Mental health check-in

[Tralfaz]

Ugh. I am so sorry to hear this. Sending love and warm wishes. Hoping your family ends up with a time for closure and healing soon.

Condolences

Condolences, man. :(

Sorry to hear that.

I am so sorry to hear that, man. This is so difficult for people to find that resolution.

So sorry. Much mojo.

That's a really tough time Tralfaz. Condolences and I hope things can come to closure sooner than later.

This, just this.

Sorry to hear you lost you’re dad.

It’s tough enough to have a loss like that, without all the crap going on now.

I have no way of imagining what you're going through, but I know the deepest pain will fade over time. The lack of closure certainly compounds all the negatives.

Losing my mother was my greatest loss. Even 25 years later, something will remind me of a special moment or perhaps something she once said, and the tears roll out. That's okay. Bittersweet moments are among life's greatest treasures.

@Tralfaz Internet hugs and garage rarities to you tralfaz. You're honestly one of my favorite dudes on here and I hope better times come quickly for you. Here's to your old man.

Mojo to you @Tralfaz. Tig summed it up well

@Tralfaz I'm very sorry.

My condolences.

@Tralfaz mojo, man. Can't even imagine.

Thanks Weiners. Your kind words really mean a lot, honestly. Sorry if I missed anyone, but thank you all!

While it breaks my heart that I didn't get to see dad one last time before Alzheimer's swept the last of him away, I am cheered remembering that the last time I saw him in February he was having one of his rare good days. He actually smiled, called me by name, and gave me a high five. It's a good memory.

 

[telecaster911]

Dang, so sorry to hear this Tralfaz. :(

 

[jbj]

Had a really good day yesterday then lost it with the wife.

By lost it I mean having a slight moan then traipsing upstairs to read my book because I didn't want to be downstairs but it was pretty out of character - we've had 1 real argument in the nearly 10 years we've been together so I was a bit conscious of how annoyed I'd got at something that usually wouldn't bother me.

I'd been doing jobs around the house all day, plus things for work and made the dinner.

I asked her to tidy the kitchen and take the clothes out of the washing machine. I came out of the hot tub to find a couple of things chucked in the dishwasher but the place still a mess and the clothes still in the machine while she was sat watching Ru Paul's Drag Race.

No biggie in the grand scheme of things and being honest, it's probably the fact she was letting the house slide to watch total brain rot TV that annoyed me more than anything but I'll keep an eye on that. I really buy into the idea of Tidy Home, Tidy Mind - I'm not a neat freak by any stretch but keeping things clean and neat is one less thing to stress about.

Anyway, I had a CBD infused rum and felt much better after it - not sure if it's a placebo or it actually does calm you down but it was nice anyway.

 

[sunvalleylaw]

Going back to the Liz Taylor meme thing and beginning again today. Today with a walk outside with the dogs early in the morning sun, then trying to take shit on that has to get done.

And I agree that tidy house/tidy office/etc. and all that Ben Franklin preachy crap, early to bed, early to rise, all that crap, helps. But those things don’t come very naturally to me, and can be a point of failure and self flagellation, that is not helpful. So, . . . Liz Taylor, begin again, walk the dogs, morning sunshine, . . . Etc.

OH! And I reconnected with my part time secretary whose schedule had gotten all blown up when she had to take on home schooling her middle schooler on top of everything else, and delegated some work. So, delegating, getting some help, . . . Yeah, that helps me too.

 

[rickenvox]

Had a really good day yesterday then lost it with the wife.

By lost it I mean having a slight moan then traipsing upstairs to read my book because I didn't want to be downstairs but it was pretty out of character - we've had 1 real argument in the nearly 10 years we've been together so I was a bit conscious of how annoyed I'd got at something that usually wouldn't bother me.

I'd been doing jobs around the house all day, plus things for work and made the dinner.

I asked her to tidy the kitchen and take the clothes out of the washing machine. I came out of the hot tub to find a couple of things chucked in the dishwasher but the place still a mess and the clothes still in the machine while she was sat watching Ru Paul's Drag Race.

No biggie in the grand scheme of things and being honest, it's probably the fact she was letting the house slide to watch total brain rot TV that annoyed me more than anything but I'll keep an eye on that. I really buy into the idea of Tidy Home, Tidy Mind - I'm not a neat freak by any stretch but keeping things clean and neat is one less thing to stress about.

Anyway, I had a CBD infused rum and felt much better after it - not sure if it's a placebo or it actually does calm you down but it was nice anyway.

Yeah, everyone needs the right to veg out in their own way, whether it’s reality TV or fine literature. Trying to control or influence what someone watches is a recipe for disaster.


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[sunvalleylaw]

Yeah, everyone needs the right to veg out in their own way, whether it’s reality TV or fine literature. Trying to control or influence what someone watches is a recipe for disaster.


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I have this weird Grey’s Anatomy re-run addiction for vegging out, along with the power pop and female band playlist that goes with it. Speaking for myself.

 

[dmn23]

Thanks Weiners. Your kind words really mean a lot, honestly. Sorry if I missed anyone, but thank you all!

While it breaks my heart that I didn't get to see dad one last time before Alzheimer's swept the last of him away, I am cheered remembering that the last time I saw him in February he was having one of his rare good days. He actually smiled, called me by name, and gave me a high five. It's a good memory.

I haven't checked this thread in a while. Sincere condolences.

 

[2manband]

Had a pretty down week last week. Trouble staying motivated/focused with work. Didnt exercise as much. Yadda yadda. Just a general case of blah.
This week has been a lot better. And tomorrow I'm taking the day off for a long weekend of spring cleaning and cutting firewood at my campsite. Plus a little fishing. Suuuuuper excited about that.

 

[DdBob]

I was suprised to get my unemployment papers in the mail yesterday....that was super quick and painless so far. I applied online Monday and Thursday I got the accepted papers, one of which i need to sign and return. I will be getting the full 840.00 per week minus state and fed taxes which I chose to have deducted now. This will be more than I make in a regular week. The 600 fed expires July 25th and the State 240 which is the maximum that anyone in AZ can collect (1170 - 240 per week in AZ) expires 1 year from now if needed. Of course with the Cares act and all you don't need to apply for jobs , etc to qualify.
At this point if the boss wants to re-open at somepoint between now and July 25th I need to have a serious sit down talk with him . I mean damn, gotta at least wait for a while.
Needless to say my Mental state is A ok right now!

 

[sunvalleylaw]

Feeling a bit better these days. Was more productive this week, and that helped. Plus regular exercise every day. That always helps.

 

[rickenvox]

I am mental
I am healthy
I am checking in


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[telecaster911]

Mental health ok.
By end of the week I’m fried though. My alarm goes off at 3am. Get to work by 5:30 to get ready to temperature check our 6am folks. Then at 7am when most folks start I temperatue check in the rest of the plant that works on site. So every day I’m in contact with 80 people. I’m suited up but still. I’ve been trying to outfit everyone’s work stations with plexiglass side shields that I’m fabricating from home when I can sneak out early. Folks work at every other station these days.

That’s me with the face shield

work from home

Made door opening hooks from the plexiglass remnants.

 

[smurfco]

My sadness and anxiety have become deep, weighty things I physically feel at all times. Like lead in the stomach. All I want to do is stay in bed. I will be OK but it’s hard. Condolences to all who are struggling. I have it relatively good and shouldn’t complain. But this is taking a real toll on an emotional foundation that wasn’t exactly up to code to begin with.

 

[Tig]

I'm more concerned with the stress my wife is going through at work than anything I might experience. She is constantly exhausted. The patients are taking out their frustrations on her and the staff, plus the exposure to illness is ramping up again.


So the Blue Angels flew a few laps around the area to honor healthcare workers. Most were too busy to step out and watch, of course.

 

[PunkKitty]

My sadness and anxiety have become deep, weighty things I physically feel at all times. Like lead in the stomach. All I want to do is stay in bed. I will be OK but it’s hard. Condolences to all who are struggling. I have it relatively good and shouldn’t complain. But this is taking a real toll on an emotional foundation that wasn’t exactly up to code to begin with.

I can relate. It's difficult to get anything done. It's frustrating.

 

[Punchy]

My sadness and anxiety have become deep, weighty things I physically feel at all times. Like lead in the stomach. All I want to do is stay in bed. I will be OK but it’s hard. Condolences to all who are struggling. I have it relatively good and shouldn’t complain. But this is taking a real toll on an emotional foundation that wasn’t exactly up to code to begin with.

For me the depression/anxiety is like a constant background hum that several times a day ramps up to concert level if that makes sense. I'll have times of absolute mental spiral, and then others where I feel completely normal and I can see my anxiety like a ship out at sea. I'm somehow being more productive with my schoolwork, but home care has taken a definite nosedive, which I know doesn't help matters. Most of the time I find myself in between the extremes, which I will take.

Anyway, mojo @smurfco, @PunkKitty, whoever else needs it right now.

 

[jbj]

Had a good few weeks now. Less general anxiety and worry in the wider sense.

Picking up the exercise has definitely helped.

On a sucky note. We had an elderly neighbour John who has recently been put into a home for dementia.

He looked after his wife for years as she was crippled by Alzheimer's until she was put in a hone a few years back. John went a bit off the rails but the community rallied round him giving him rides to visit her, we would cook him stuff so he wasn't just ordering take away. Christ I even spent 3 hours trying to fix an unfixable record player at his house just for an excuse to keep him company one time he was particularly down.


His wife passed away yesterday. No one's had any contact with him obviously since lock down and his family are only bothered about selling his house no idea how compus he is to take the news in so that's bummed me out. He's either in there half fuddled and breaking his heart or on a different planet, oblivious which is nice but means next time I'm able to visit he won't recognise me.

He's a great guy John and it's tragic the way his latter life has panned out

 

[Punchy]

This was a thought that came to me tonight:

"These things that we've called demons, they're nothing but our own insecurities trying to tear us down when we are at our lowest. Our brains are capable of amazing things, supercomputer-plus, but for some reason we latch on to the negative.

I want you to throw that away, grab hold of the positive, the things you've accomplished, completed, started, anything. The negative thoughts are literally you trying to sabotage your own happiness. DO NOT LET YOURSELF DO THIS."

 

[sunvalleylaw]

Ok, I have been getting ramped up again. I care deeply about social justice. I was raised to believe in our system but turns out it is shit, and change will be very hard to accomplish and take years and years to make anything right. If we can. And there are so many people in denial/cognitive dissonance, etc. And just plain stupid. Wear a fucking mask for Gawd's sake!! Jesus Fucking Christ!

And when shit like this happens, I want to try to fix things, so I try hard at whatever. A board I am on dealing out a little financial help to people in crisis, trying to talk to people and open minds, . . . but procrastinating on my own work. And it stresses me out that I can't fix any of this, though I am the first born sainted privileged son and the Dad and should be able to do something. So, I am amped up a little.

I guess it helps to say it out loud and name it so I can detach a little. Thanks for the thread so I can check in.

 

[DFB]

I was doing good until a few weeks ago.
In the past 1 1/2 years I finally got most of my shit together.
Job was going ok.
I quit drinking completely,bought a new Harley.
My body was recovering from the abuse I've done to it.

The VA set me up with a blood test to see how I'm doing after getting sober.
Everything came back great,except for one thing.
I have been diagnosed with CLL .It's a form of leukemia.

The Marine Corps has been sending me letters for the past 10 years about being stationed at Camp Lejune.
The drinking water was contaminated with benzene,and other industrial solvents.
Leukemia is one of the eight diseases the contamination can cause.

I am now working on getting treated,and I have applied for disability through the VA.
If and when my job calls me back,I won't be able to return because of the Covid virus.

It's always the same with me.Things are going good,then I get a kick in the nuts.

At least I can ride the bike,and work on my partscaster keep me distracted a bit.