Had to make an amendment to my website

dougk

dougk

b00b
Due to the volume of emails I get, I thought I'd give some suggestions:

< email form >
THINGS WE LOVE GETTING EMAILS ABOUT:
  • "Hey, can I get leopard print metal flake as an option" (Sure. I guess!)
  • "What pickups do you use?" (did you read the FAQ?)
  • "I love your beard and hammers. You are a sexy lumberjack. Will you marry my sister?" (Thanks but no thanks)
  • " I really love my Kauer, thank you so much. Just wanted to tell you that." Our favorite email!
  • "Can I come by for a shop tour?" Absolutely!
THINGS WE REALLY, REALLY HATE GETTING EMAILED ABOUT
  • "Hey I'm so and so and I'm in a band with 80 followers on instagram, can I get artist price?" Did you read the FAQ or Artist page? No, obviously not. EVERYONE pays retail for their first Kauer. If you ask us this, we may not even respond. If we do and you can't be bothered to send us a reply we will sign you up for Unicorn Pornmail. Seriously.
  • "Will you build me a Banshee v1.0? No.
  • "Hey how much is a JM6?" I don't know, ask Dennis Fano. :wink:
  • "Give me a deal because the Shadow Governments and the media are conspiring to keep the economy down". uh... ok? Sorry about that. On behalf of the media elite we apologize.
 
You need more Monty Python references..... (Welcome to Castle Anthrax) :helper:

I love this part

  • Why don't your guitars come in a hardcase? Because we're jerks. And we 100% support our friends at www.monocase.com and their wonderful line of products that fit our guitars like they were designed for them.


  • But I really, really, really, want a hardcase: No problem! Daylighter Expresses will fit any case designed for a Jazzmaster and Starliners will fit most generic Les Paul cases. Your's is still going to ship in a Mono bag.
Click to expand...
 
No link for Unicorn Pornmail? :embarrassed:

One of these days I'll have to swing by after work. Your shop is only about 20 minutes out of my way - although that would put me there at like 5:30 and you're likely gone by then anyway, eh?
 
Punchy said:
No link for Unicorn Pornmail? :embarrassed:

One of these days I'll have to swing by after work. Your shop is only about 20 minutes out of my way - although that would put me there at like 5:30 and you're likely gone by then anyway, eh?
Click to expand...

Come to the open house! Much more fun anyways! (You're right, I'm never there that late. Daddy duty takes over about 4pm usually for me.

Tig said:
"I have an excellent parts car Volvo. Do you take trades?"
Click to expand...

LOL that might have to go into the "emails we like" portion.

Seriously, I had a phone call on tuesday that in 7 minutes touched on the following topics:
*shadow governments
*media black out of the truth by the media elite
*how he used to live in reno but his ex girlfriend got him setup for drug charges
*he's been playing for 50 years and people notice what he's playing so he should get a free one
*the liberators of freedom movement is going to overthrow our shadow government and reset the economy by sept 3rd

There was more but I can't remember it all. SEVEN MINUTE PHONE CALL.
 
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