Newsflash! Did you know the song "Abraham, Martin, and John" by Dion had an extra verse where he asked "anybody here have a SunSetter retractable awning"?

smurfco

smurfco

Meatus McPrepuce
At least in later performances it did. The story goes that Dion was considering getting one for his house, but his wife threatened to divorce him for "hanging a tacky-looking piece of striped fabric from the side of our house and driving the whole neighborhood's property values down". Dion wanted some anecdotal evidence from people as to whether or not they had one, and if so, how much they used it and enjoyed it. He wanted to be able to prove to his wife that it was a good idea. It is unknown if he ever succeeded in pleading his case as he died before ever putting one on his house.
 
Dion was a big ol' heroin addict at that time, so a lot of that shit is shady/questionable in a Lou Reed kinda way.

unjerk/ 'Daddy Rollin' (in your arms) is arguably the greatest B-side of all time, and also equal to anything ANYTHING! the Velvet Underground did.




Okay, maybe 'Stephanie Says' and 'Candy Says' are better. Maybe. But 'Daddy Rollin'' smashes everything else.
 
Believe it or not, there was actually an episode of Doug about SunSetter awnings, too. Here's a synopsis:

Title: Doug's Awning Disaster

[The scene opens with Doug sitting at the kitchen table, flipping through a comic book. He hears the front door slam and rushes to see what's happening.]

Doug: (worried) Mom, Dad, what's going on?

[Theda is pacing back and forth in the living room, visibly upset. Phil stands with a determined expression on his face.]

Theda: (fuming) Doug, your father decided to put up that tacky SunSetter awning without consulting me first!

Doug: (confused) Awning? What awning?

[Theda storms past Doug and points to the side of the house where a large, striped awning has been installed over the patio.]

Theda: (angrily) That eyesore! It makes our house look like a trailer park! I can't believe you didn't talk to me about this, Phil!

Phil: (defensively) It's not an eyesore, Theda. It's a SunSetter awning! It's top-of-the-line, providing shade and protection from the sun. Plus, it adds value to our home!

Theda: (sarcastically) Oh, sure. Because nothing says sophistication like a giant piece of striped fabric hanging off the side of our house.

[Doug's mom storms out of the house, determination in her eyes.]

Doug: Mom, what are you doing?

[Ignoring Doug's question, Theda marches towards the awning with determination. She starts to pull at it, trying to rip it down.]

Phil: (furious) Theda, stop it! Leave my awning alone!

[Theda manages to tear a section of the awning down, ruining it. Phil's anger turns to disbelief.]

Phil: (shouting) You ruined it! That awning cost us a fortune!

[With a smug look on her face, Theda turns to Phil, expecting him to be outraged.]

Phil: (condescendingly) It's not a big deal, Theda. SunSetter has a lifetime guarantee. They'll replace it, no questions asked. That's how great of a company they are.

[Phil marvels at the awning, momentarily forgetting the tension between them.]

Phil: You can keep tearing them down, and I'll keep putting them up. It's as simple as that.

[Theda, realizing the futility of the situation, gets in her car and drives away, leaving Phil standing in the driveway, alone with his beloved awning.]
 
smurfco said:
It is unknown if he ever succeeded in pleading his case as he died before ever putting one on his house.
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Well it seems to me that he lives his life, like a retractable awning in the wind. Lucky for him, that awning is a SunSetter. Dion is alive.

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smurfco said:
him being alive is the factual inaccuracy y'all take issue with?
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Glad you brought that up. I was going to fact check yesterday, but we went to see the Dodgers and Shohei. He went 4 for 4 in the final game in the sweep of the Braves with 2 homeruns. It was little league day at Dodgers stadium. Our team is the Braves. I had on a Braves coach hat and a Dodgers shirt. My kid had on his Braves uniform so we could do the parade lap around the field.

My kid changed into his Freeman shirt he made me buy at the stadium. He already had an Ohtani and Betts jersey.

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the dodgers owned my beloved braves this weekend. embarrassing. but glad y'all had a fun time! ohtani is ridiculous.
 
he was just asking his audiences. at that point in his career it wasn't too taxing to record each audience member's answer, it only took about five minutes
 
the full verse went like this

Anybody here
Have a SunSetter retractable awning?
Can you tell me how you like it?
They sold a lot of awnings but my wife remains unconvinced
Come tell me after the show
 
Christopher Cross had that one line in his song, asking about the SunSetter Retractable Awning's full, lifetime limited warranty.
As you know by his songs, Chris had a true passion for the wind.
His SunSetter Retractable Awning, not so much...

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