Post your favorite Prince Philip quotes here.

dmn23

Duller than cardboard
Now 95 years old, the Royal Trainwreck will no longer be a public presence in the service of the Crown. Let's mark the occasion by posting our favorite quotes, gaffes, and wildly offensive comments.

I'll get the ball rolling:


"It looks like a tart's bedroom." (on seeing plans for the Duke and Duchess of York's house at Sunninghill Park in 1988)

"You're too fat to be an astronaut." (to 13-year-old Andrew Adams who told Philip he wanted to go into space. Salford, 2001).

"Do you still throw spears at each other?" (In Australia in 2002 talking to a successful aborigine entrepreneur).

"The Philippines must be half empty as you're all here running the NHS." (on meeting a Filipino nurse at a Luton hospital in February 2013)

On the Royal Family's finances: "We go into the red next year. I shall probably have to give up polo."
 
The Duke said to Tom Jones after his Royal Variety Performance: "What do you gargle with, pebbles?".
He later added: "It is very difficult at all to see how it is possible to become immensely valuable by singing what I think are the most hideous songs."

When asked if he would like to visit the Soviet Union: "I would like to go to Russia very much, although the bastards murdered half my family."

And my favorite:

He asked a Scottish driving instructor in Oban: "How do you keep the natives off the booze long enough to pass the test?"
 
My wife's step-father was a career Royal Navy man and served on board a ship with Phillip. His remarks pointed to the fact that Phillip was a drinker and rather handy with the ladies...
 
"You are a woman, aren't you?"
- Just checking, when a native woman in Kenya presents him with a small gift in 1984.

"Everybody was saying we must have more leisure. Now they are complaining they are unemployed."
- Wide of the mark in 1981 at the height of the British recession.

"It looks as though it was put in by an Indian."
- The Prince's verdict of a fuse box during a tour of a Scottish factory in August 1999.
 
During a 1998 official visit to a British student who had been trekking in Papua New Guinea, Prince Philip asked: "You managed not to get eaten, then?" in an apparent reference to the historic belief that cannibalism had been practiced on the South Pacific islands.
 
In Philip's defense, the people of the South Fore in Papua New Guinea practiced ritual cannibalism well into the 1970's. I have a good friend who visits there regularly for his work on kuru.
 
In Philip's defense, the people of the South Fore in Papua New Guinea practiced ritual cannibalism well into the 1970's. I have a good friend who visits there regularly for his work on kuru.
Is it there that they only eat a bit of the brain?
 
He makes Joe Biden look like a super brain guy.

Biden doesn't need to cross the Atlantic to find someone who'd make him look like a super brain guy. The majority of the elected officials on Capitol Hill would/could or (in fact) do the job better.
 
He walked in on my brother once during his first year at Oxford, just barged into his room, said hello, then proceeded to harangue him for five minutes about the state of his room. My brother said he though he could smell a bit of whisky on his breath.
 
I don't think a prostitute is more moral than a wife, but they are doing the same thing.

Do you still throw spears at each other?


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Having seen the insides of numerous Indian instruments my teacher was repairing, I understand exactly what he meant. Indian culture doesn’t value craftsmanship and standards the way many others do.
 
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