WTF: Please say a prayer for my butthole.

Kerouac

Kerouac

weird musical dildo
Spent two hours on the porcelain throne this morning, surveying my lands through a haze of constipation. I took a laxative after I couldn't stand it anymore, and now the muddy rains have burst forth and threaten to drown those same lands in a mudslide.

About 45 min. if the reaper showed up I would have gladly gone with him. BRB; the throne beckons once more.

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Hey, I'm prepping for a colonoscopy right now. I've been shitting my brains out since 2:embarrassed:0am.
The stuff coming out of me at this point looks like chicken broth.
Wheeeeeee!
 
micwalt said:
Hey, I'm prepping for a colonoscopy right now. I've been shitting my brains out since 2:embarrassed:0am.
The stuff coming out of me at this point looks like chicken broth.
Wheeeeeee!
Click to expand...

*high five*...

After we was our hands. cop0
 
micwalt said:
Hey, I'm prepping for a colonoscopy right now. I've been shitting my brains out since 2:embarrassed:0am.
The stuff coming out of me at this point looks like chicken broth.
Wheeeeeee!
Click to expand...


Here's Dave Barry's take on the prep for a colonoscopy, and in my experience, it understates things"

"The instructions for MoviPrep, clearly written by somebody with a great sense of humor, state that after you drink it, ''a loose watery bowel movement may result.'' This is kind of like saying that after you jump off your roof, you may experience contact with the ground.

MoviPrep is a nuclear laxative. I don't want to be too graphic, here, but: Have you ever seen a space shuttle launch? This is pretty much the MoviPrep experience, with you as the shuttle. There are times when you wish the commode had a seat belt. You spend several hours pretty much confined to the bathroom, spurting violently. You eliminate everything. And then, when you figure you must be totally empty, you have to drink another liter of MoviPrep, at which point, as far as I can tell, your bowels travel into the future and start eliminating food that you have not even eaten yet."
 
bsman said:
Here's Dave Barry's take on the prep for a colonoscopy, and in my experience, it understates things"

"The instructions for MoviPrep, clearly written by somebody with a great sense of humor, state that after you drink it, ''a loose watery bowel movement may result.'' This is kind of like saying that after you jump off your roof, you may experience contact with the ground.

MoviPrep is a nuclear laxative. I don't want to be too graphic, here, but: Have you ever seen a space shuttle launch? This is pretty much the MoviPrep experience, with you as the shuttle. There are times when you wish the commode had a seat belt. You spend several hours pretty much confined to the bathroom, spurting violently. You eliminate everything. And then, when you figure you must be totally empty, you have to drink another liter of MoviPrep, at which point, as far as I can tell, your bowels travel into the future and start eliminating food that you have not even eaten yet."
Click to expand...
Right on the money. Although the name of the stuff I'm taking is "Go Lytely"--ain't nothing Lytely about the way I'm going.
 
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