I'm starting to think Pistorious might have been innocent

J

jbj

Poor old Geordie's array...
I woke up last night and heard someone on the upstairs landing.

I grabbed my trusty speaker pole I keep next to the bed (incase I ever need to set up a sub and top combo in my bedroom of course!) and as a dark figure appeared in my bedroom doorway I shouted something to the effect of "I'm going to fuck you right up" and made to go for the figure

At which point my girlfriend who had been up to pee switched the light on, shouted at me and told me to get back to bed :cry:

Not quite the same as grabbing a gun and firing it through a closed door but the thing took seconds and if I hadn't shouted and let her known I was up I'd have hit her with the pole :facepalm:


Now she's calling me Oscar the Ninja on account of nearly doing her in and the fact I allegedly pulled some weird ninja stance on the bed when I got up :grin: :cry:
 
At least you figured it out before anything bad happened.... Oscar the Ninja has a nice ring to it though.
 
Coralkong said:
At least you weren't Oscar the Dumbass Ninja.
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I guess living with Mrs. P. for the last 17 years has desensitized me. She could get up, turn the lights on, go pee, have the dogs jump on top of me, beat me with a ball bat, and set the house on fire, and I wouldn't even bat an eye.
 
Prages said:
I guess living with Mrs. P. for the last 17 years has desensitized me. She could get up, turn the lights on, go pee, have the dogs jump on top of me, beat me with a ball bat, and set the house on fire, and I wouldn't even bat an eye.
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She has lulled you into a false sense of security. She's going to pull a Basic Instinct on you. Without the upside.
 
Jbird said:
There will be warning signs first though, like finding the family rabbit cooking in a pot.
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You're thinking of Fatal Attraction, which is a rehash of Play Misty For Me, not a movie about a bisexual femme fatale who engages in bondage with men as a dom and engages in coitus interruptus via deadly stabbing.
 
Flamencology said:
You're thinking of Fatal Attraction, which is a rehash of Play Misty For Me, not a movie about a bisexual femme fatale who engages in bondage with men as a dom and engages in coitus interruptus via deadly stabbing.
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Please don't talk about Mrs. P that way.




Unless of course you've had the pleasure of meeting her.




:helper:
 
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