Register To ReplyIf you wanna ride, don't ride the white bike?
Jello's Taxi tales...
This Week's Episode:
Horse-Face-Plant
When things get slow, sometimes I find a nice shady spot to park and wait for my next call. Today I was parked by the 2nd Baptist Church, over by the bowling alley and Garcia's LatinAmerican Market...
I was just getting into my new Sports Illustrated when I hear and odd clatter from over by the bowling alley...I look up and see a riderless bicycle on the ground...it was riderless because the guy riding it was lying face down in the parking lot...
get up...c'mon man, get up...
Nope...he gets to his knees, crawls a few feet and falls again...
shit...
I grabbed my cel phone and dialed up the city police...
"yeah, send an officer and an ambulance to the bowling alley, some guy just passed out on the ground..."
I drive over to him and get out...the guy is soaked with sweat, hid face id a bloody mess...there's gravel stuck to his face...and he's shaking...and when I say "shaking" I mean like I've never seen anyone shake before...
"stay down man...I got an ambulance coming..."
...totally unresponsive...vacant stare...totally disconnected from reality...oh good the cop's here...
"is an ambulance coming?"
"Calm down dude"
calm down? fuck, this guys gonna die of heatstroke right in front of me...
the nice police officer proceeds to try and interview the guy...rather unsuccessfully, I must say...ambulance is here...
"what are you on?"
"...heroin..."
HEROIN? HEROIN! you stupid FUCK it's 100 degrees out here and you riding a bike OD'd on HEROIN?!?
The ambulance crew loads the junkie asshole up, the nice friendly police officer gets in his car and they all drive away...
HEY! what about me? can I go now?
YOU'RE WELCOME!
nothing...I'm not looking for a citizen's award or anything but at least a "thanks, you can go sir, we got this" would have been nice, ya know?
If you wanna ride, don't ride the white bike?
Ah the joys of the good samaritan.
I ate your danged habenaro now get off my backOriginally Posted by Eminence_Front
Silly Jello interrupting a Donut break.
All of the video lessons are being moved here:http://markweinguitarlessons.com/
Check out my blog LoveHateGuitar.com and my page: http://markwein.com/
Buy Foundations for Guitar on Amazon.com
I would have just taken his bike...
I may or may not have completely misinterpreted my misconceptions as perceptions of misconstrued disinformation...
Your right - a thank you would have been nice. Unfortunately they don't think about that stuff often enough. Congrats on doing the right thing....
Yet another friend of Jack...
You did the right thing, jello.
The cop was thinking "Damn,we were THAT close to getting rid of a junkie."
EG
you work with Bjork?
you work with Bjork?
I ate your danged habenaro now get off my back
I wish.......you work with Bjork?
Yet another friend of Jack...
Atta-boy.
Feel better?
I do.
EG
I totally laughed. Does that make me a bad person?
Proud member of the I ate a habenaro and lived fraternity
Friend of Jack
no...I laughed too...
As did I. Was it a cool bike?no...I laughed too...
EG
no it was exactly the kind of bike you'd expect a dumb-ass junkie fuck to be riding...
Figures. Why do they all have to follow the stereotypes?
EG
Stolen?
Yet another friend of Jack...
Well at least he wasn't feeling any pain.
South Park episode ftw.As did I. Was it a cool bike?
EG
Proud member of the I ate a habenaro and lived fraternity
Friend of Jack
Q: Why don't you run over a ............ (in this case, junky) on a bicycle?
A: It might be your bike...
I may or may not have completely misinterpreted my misconceptions as perceptions of misconstrued disinformation...
Posting Permissions
Bookmarks